Path through the woods

When I began my business the first time around, I thought I did all the right things. I headed to social media multiple times a day. I talked to people I didn’t know. I hired a website designer to handle all my media content and I even wrote a book. I got my logo and business name trademarked and followed all the steps I thought I needed to do in order to be a successful entrepreneur. But as I started falling short, I quickly became engulfed in multi level marketing businesses, 1 in particular. I figured they knew something I didn’t know and since I wanted to excel, I had better listen up….and pay their monthly fee.

So I did. I began to follow their algorithms for social media and this is what started me on my path to complete and utter failure. The more I tried, the shittier I felt because the more I was on social media, the less sincere I felt & the more overwhelmed I got. The worst part? I had “come out” to my friends and family that I was opening my business and that the products and programs I was offering were solid and noteworthy. At this point in my life, I felt like I was too old to fail this big. So I went silent.

For more than a year, I did not post a single thing on social media. My miniscule following had dried up and worse, I looked at the people with whom I associated with prior with resentment and jealousy. Looking back, those feelings were ones I harbored for way to long because that was where I once looked to for my sense of worthiness. Yep, my own sense of worthiness came from a place of people and lifestyles with whom I didn’t even know. Seriously though, what the fuck was I thinking? Unfortunately, I know I am not alone.

Fast forward many years and what seems to be lifetime. I am more grounded. Present. Steady and confident. Why? Because I did “the work”. I found my place of re-centering and made it THE MOST important thing in my life. Relationships were second. Work was second. My once treasured “to-do” list, was second. For the first time in my entire life, I became selfish for the reason that selfish is meant to be. I focused on what I needed and how to truly get from there to here.